Lesson Two
Pleasing Plants
Welcome back! It's a beautiful day here on the grounds so it seems like the perfect time to investigate what I like to call pleasing plants. This is a catch-all term for the magical plants that we cultivate because they look nice, we find them interesting or they make us feel good. These plants often serve no real purpose other than to improve our mood but they can be just as fascinating as flesh-eating trees or life-saving potion ingredients.
Now I'm honour bound to point out before we begin that beauty is by no means everything and plants that are commonly held to be ugly can be exceedingly useful (more on that next lesson). However, the practice of growing plants because they are pretty (you'll often hear these called ornamental) or entertaining has been around for far, far longer than Hogwarts Castle has.
They also tend to be popular with the wizarding public: these plants are big business in the world of magical horticulture. Just like taking care of a pet, looking after a plant can give people a real sense of satisfaction, peace, and/or companionship. It's unsurprising that the plants favoured for this purpose often are able to move on their own or perform some other interesting trick. People like to look after things that respond to them.
Some of you might also suspect that I'm starting here because the pleasing plants tend to be the less aggressive sort. To you, I say 'don't be so sure'. While many of these pretty or amusing plants are perfectly harmless, there are many that you would do well to be cautious around as well. Don't let a sweet smell or vibrant flower lure you in too far.
Now that I've sufficiently terrified you all with that, let's start our tour of the ornamental section of the greenhouse.
Fanged Geranium
This is a good illustration of what I was just saying. Geraniums are gorgeous and very aromatic plants. They have attractively fuzzy leaves (that smell great when you rub them) and bright flowers that come in several colours, including white, pink and deep red. They make excellent pot plants or window box flowers.
However, the variety we have here in the greenhouse is a little less innocent. Fanged geraniums have sharp teeth and have been known to nibble on humans if they're too slow to get out of the way. They also tend to bite if not properly taken care of, so they make a poor choice for the inattentive herbologist.
Uses: Mainly ornamental, though their fangs are a sort after potions ingredient.
Care Tips: You must re-pot them extremely carefully, always keep them happy and occasionally brush their fangs to avoid them becoming gummy.
Flitterbloom
Now I'll admit this one might not look particularly pretty but it most definitely has its fans amongst the wizarding population. Flitterblooms have long, tentacle-like leaves that constantly wriggle and flutter on their own. They're often kept as house plants because they have more personality than your average cactus (I have an aunt who swears hers dances to opera). They are also used by wizarding landscape gardeners to add a bit of movement to a flower bed as they can give the impression that the whole garden is rippling in a light breeze, even on a very still day.
One thing it is especially important to note about the Flitterbloom is its resemblance to a very different plant. Devil's Snare is also a plant with undulating, vine-like leaves but it is far from harmless as it will seek to throttle an unsuspecting person. Some of you might have heard how this likeness caused the tragic death of a patient at St Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries many years ago when the healer failed to notice the difference. It is vital to treat any new Flitterbloom with caution until you're quite sure it isn't trying to attack you.
Uses: Ornamental
Care Tips: Keep them well watered and away from anything which their leaves might snag on.
Flutterby Bush
This is another plant that is celebrated for the attractive way it moves on its own. The leaves are constantly in motion as they shiver and quake. They are medium-sized shrubs that do best either being planted directly into the ground or in large pots where their roots can spread out. They are incredibly long-lived (an ultra-perennial, you could say) so are a great investment. You will need to prune them once a year or so to keep them from becoming too unkempt.
This plant is mostly harmless. However, every hundred years they will bloom. The flowers are magically designed to smell irresistibly attractive to anyone who wanders past; accounts vary about what the plants do once they have drawn someone in but please trust me when I say you should not seek to find out. Those of you who are curious about the smells that most attract you would be safer brewing amortentia (and that's not something I ever thought I'd say...).
Uses: Ornamental
Care Tips: Plant them somewhere where they have lots of space, prune them regularly and if you're unsure of the age of your Flutterby bush, be very careful!
Mimbulus Mimbletonia
This is another plant that isn't traditionally attractive and given how rare it is, you won't often find it on window ledges in wizarding homes. It resembles a cactus in a lot of ways. However, rather than spines, it is covered in little swellings. When touched, these release an unpleasant-smelling liquid known as stinksap. While this isn't dangerous, it is incredibly messy and reeks of rancid manure. (Please stand well back). This is a defence mechanism, a concept we'll discuss more in lesson 4.
This is quite a niche plant, really only favoured by particularly keen herbologists. However, as it serves no other purpose than being very interesting to grow, it has a place here.
Note: Some people claim that stinksap can be used to nurse ill animals back to health but this claim has yet to be proven.
Uses: Just a curiosity (probably)
Care Tips: Don't overwater it and handle it very carefully. You may also wish to invest in a nose plug.
Honking Daffodils
Now you probably heard this one as soon as you came in. The honking daffodil is a vibrant yellow flower with a centre a lot like a trumpet. They are almost exactly like the daffodils that you will see cropping up all over the place in springtime, save for the rather obnoxious hooting noise they make. Some wizards find them charming while others have threatened to take a wand to them.
There's little to fear from these flowers. The only real risk is that muggles may hear them if they are planted in wizarding gardens nearby.
Uses: Purely ornamental, used as a gimmicky gift
Care Tips: You may want to wear your earmuffs if dealing with them for an extended period as the noise can get on the nerves somewhat
Screechsnap
Here's another noisy one keeping the daffodils company. Screechsnaps are quite pretty: the green foliage and purple flowers are certainly very nice to look at. What really attracts people though is the fact that they have a certain amount of awareness. They're able to feel discomfort and pleasure, for instance. It's this which makes them another popular wizarding house plant. People like a plant that will respond, rather than just sit there and grow (or wither).
There's not much to fear from these ones either, save the high-pitched screeching.
Use: Ornamental, a sort of plant pet
Care Tips: Be very gentle with them so you don't offend them and don't give them too much fertilizer or water at any one time. Perhaps another one for your earmuffs...
Right, I think that will do for one lesson. Let's get away from this din...